Have you ever noticed all the B-words associated with the collegiate Spring Break? Booze, Bikini, Beirut, Bars, Bahamas … I mean the list can go on and on. Further, with all that sun and drinking on foreign soil, you most likely missed your weekly intake of sports.
Fear not, though, for here is the quick update on what you missed as well as some of my own bonus anectdotes from the beach. And, in homage to those favorite Spring Break buzz words from the B-section of the dictionary — and a little help from a thesauraus — here is a list of notables from the sports world over the past week. So put down the Bacardi, rub some aloe on your sun Burn and take your mind off that Blistering STD you picked up in the Caribbean as I take a moment to catch you up.
Ballers
With the disappointing early exit for Cornell hockey, the men’s lacrosse team has given us just the thing to fill the void. Off to a 6-0 start for the second straight year, the No. 1 Red is a bonified title contenders, especially after wins over No. 18 Notre Dame, No. 9 Army and No. 5 Duke. Further, after blasting Yale 19-8 in its Ivy League opener, Cornell shows no signs of letting up. Meanwhile, Head coach Jeff Tambroni is the US Lacrosse Coach of the Week, senior defender Mitch Belisle is the Ivy League Player of the Week honors, and senior goalie Matt McMonagle owns an eye-opening 6.13 goal against average and .617 save percentage. Life for Cornell lacrosse fans does not get much better.
Blackout
The unfortunate result of some serious drinking sports (okay, games but it takes as much skill as sports and, apparently, I lack those skills across the board) Monday night in Aruba. Details are hazy following this sporting mishap. However, I did prompt security of our hotel to leave us a kind note — in perfect Arubian English — the next day: Warning … Due to your last night behaviour feel sorry to tell you that … one more complain means that we will be forced to take action to … gurantee the tranquility of our other guests. Regards, Security.
Bloodlines
Talk about living up to family tradition – Head coach John Thompson III and reserve forward Patrick Ewing Jr. avenged their namesakes’ loss in the 1982 NCAA championship game as Georgetown knocked off North Carolina, 96-84, in overtime in the East Regional Final. After rallying back from ten back in the final six minutes, the Hoyas dominated the extra period as the Tar Heels managed just one field goal in the final 15 minutes of the game. Next up – Ewing and Thompson will try to win the university’s first national title since their famous fathers did it in 1984.
Blue Monster
Is golf fair right now? Doesn’t seem to be after Tiger Woods cruised to his eighth PGA tournament victory in his last 10 appearances on Doral’s Blue Monster course. Mr. Woods — you married a Swedish Model, you play golf for a living and you’re closing in on $80 million in career earnings — do you need a caddy?
Body Checked
Not only Cornell hockey, but the entire ECACHL in the NCAA tournament. After finally mustering the courage to check out the college hockey scene after the Red’s playoff loss to Quinnipiac, it was disappointing to find that neither of our NCAA-qualifying conference foes didn’t make a dent in the bracket. No. 1 seed Clarkson couldn’t find the back of the net in a 1-0 loss to UMass, while St. Lawrence exited with a 4-1 loss to Boston College. ECACHL teams need to find a way to reach the Frozen Four soon or become relegated as a lesser conference.
Boot and Rally
Ohio St.’s journey to the Final Four may be no better described than this frat party war cry. After rallying from an 11 point deficit with a little over 7 minutes left in its second round match-up with Xavier and a 20 point comeback against Tennessee in the Sweet 16, the Buckeyes have epitomized the Git’r Done attitude late in games. Is OSU playing with fire or just catching fire – who knows? But, with the Buckeyes atop my bracket, winning ugly works for me.
Boring
That’s what this entire tournament has been: boring. Where are the Cinderella’s? What happened to this year’s George Mason? Come on – two NO. 1 seed and two No. 2 seeds in the Final Four, while No. 3 Oregon was the only Elite Eight surprise, if you can call it that. It’s like watching the New York Yankees make the playoffs each year – we’d rather watch the little guy than the juggernauts.
Bound for Glory
The Sigma Phi team kicked off its intramural season early with a brutal Spring Training trip to Aruba. Returning all starters from last year’s Elite Eight team, the squad is ready to go after some intense training (beach volleyball), eating plenty of protein (Hooter’s Wings) and staying hydrated (via yard’s of cheap Margarita from Carlos n’ Charlies). Even the 10 (AM) curfew was strictly followed. Though, the team suffered an embarrassing 19-2 loss to the Oranjestad 12-year old All-Stars early the week, those results are under contention. The kids had more facial hair than me, and drug tests are pending after their coach tried to sell some HGH to one of the beefier members of our team.
Brackets
My validity as a sport writer has finally been proven after correctly picking all four Final Four teams. Then again, about half the campus has all four of the highly-ranked teams tabbed and my girlfriend is still kicking my ass in the overall standings, again proving that knowing less is an advantage come tourney time. Meanwhile, thanks to Facebook, I can offer congratulations to senior Gordon McLaughlin who can claim the Cornell-leading bracket. Please except my friend request.
Bryant
Overshadowed by the NCAA tournament, Kobe Bryant’s four-game 50-point scoring streak is still nothing short of heroic. Wining each of those contests, Bryant appeared to single-handedly boost the Lakers playoff hopes while matching legendary Wilt Chamberlain as the only two players to achieve the feat. Maybe a single players can’t win NBA Championships by themselves, but it sure looks like they can win games.
Belief
The Chicago Cubs will win the World Series this year. Believing that each year is the year for our cubbies is all that keeps Cub fans coming back each year. And, the championship streak can’t hit 100 years — can it?
Scott Reich is a Sun Staff Writer. Scotty Doesn’t Know will appear every other Tuesday this semester.