September 27, 2007

Overheard: They're Not Sad, They're Studying

Print More

Get the real news about your campus in Overheard, every Thursday right here in Daze. And when you’re not reading, send your submissions to overheard.cor­nell@g­ Keep them coming!

Little boy: Why does everyone look so sad?
Boy’s father: They’re not sad, they’re studying.
— Duffield Atrium

Sorority girl: The work doesn’t go away just because you’re shopping.
— Outside Uris

Nervous Girl: Do you think that eating too much peanut butter could, you know, back you up?
Confident Girl: Absolutely not, if peanut butter backed you up, I would have a permanent plug in my colon.
— College Ave.

Quarter Carder [brandishing paper]: Don’t forget to vote!
Guy: Tell me something, what do you think of people who hand out quarter cards?
Quarter Carder [still brandishing paper]: I think they’re obnoxious. [smiles]
Guy: …. right. [takes paper]
— Thurston Ave. Bridge

Girl [in midsentence]: … I killed and ate him, and then made a rug out of his skin …
— Entering Baker Lab

Girl on cellphone: So I just let him stick it in my butt.

[Guy 1 wakes up from nap in Duffield hall and sees a girl walking away]
Guy 1: Is she hot?
Guy 2: Yeah
Guy 1: You saw her face?
Guy 2: Yeah … she definitely was not an engineer.
Guy 1: Welp, I have morning wood.
— Duffield
Girl: I just got molested by the bear.
— Football game

Townie Girl: You know, I really don’t function well when you throw objects at me.
Townie Boy: At least it was only two vases and a teacup this time. Last time we had a fight it was bricks, remember?
— Target parking lot

Guy: So I asked my math major friend to solve this problem. If your mom’s face is ugly, does that mean your face’s mom is ugly?
[long pensive pause]
Guy:[very seriously] Wow.
Guy 2: [thoughtfully] I know.
— Next to Schwartz Center

Climber girl: [in company of four (egocentric) hunky guys] It’s times like these, that I consider myself to have a penis.
— Hurricane Crag, Adirondacks

Guy: She’s such an addict!
Girl: No, she’s always like this.
— Collegetown