November 20, 2008

Overheard Nov. 20: "Yeah, I was still sucking when it flew out."

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(While rock climbing in New Hampshire)

Climber Guy: … So the archaeopteryx was, like, the link between dinosaurs and birds.
Climber guy’s Girlfriend: So it could fly, right?
Climber Guy: Well, I don’t know but I would guess so.
Climber guy’s Girlfriend: The real question is could the pterodactyl fly?
Climber Guy: No way ­— of course it couldn’t!
Climber guy’s Girlfriend: Well it had wings …
Climber Guy: All I know is that the pterodactyl had bones.

— Base of cliff

Aggie: Yeah, I still gotta bleed my pig so I can do some assays.

— Vet School

Guy 1: Why were you looking for “the penis soliloquies?”
Guy 2: It’s just a site I like to go to!
— Collegetown

(At 1 a.m. on a Thursday night)

Angry R.A. in Balch: Could you please keep it down out there?
Gender-confused freshman chick: Suck my dick, Balch!

— Balch courtyard

Disgruntled worker:  I used to have a tequila drawer, and then my tequila drawer was stolen.

— The Commons

Creeper stoner: Yeah, I was still sucking when it flew out.

— Lower Collegetown

Natty-Res major: I should get drunk before this presentation. That would make it FANTASTIC!

— North Campus

Small, bookish english grad student to another english grad student: I just want to say to him: fucking c**t, I’m going to cut you in the face … but I just don’t know how constructive that would be.

— Goldwin Smith

Southern belle, very matter-of-factly: My dad killed a fawn today [while hunting] … it had a broken leg; it was a mercy killing, but he’s still gonna eat it.

— Wyckoff Ave.

Drunk dude: Johnny O’s is now Johnny Closed.

— Collegetown

Girl, loudly: I can fuck any girl I want to and nobody will hear about it.

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