On my list of favorite holidays, Halloween falls securely within the top five after Christmas, Thanksgiving and my birthday (which often coincides with Memorial Day; so yes, my birthday actually warrants a national celebration sometimes). Honestly, on what other day can you dress, eat and drink like a monster sans judgment? Halloween is amazing because it allows you to become someone (or something) that you have always wondered about being, without any long-withstanding implications to your day-to-day self. On this wonderful day, sweets of all types are consumed by the masses, and your preferred candy of choice can say a lot about your Halloween costume.

Hershey’s Kisses

Hershey’s Kisses are simply good. While there’s nothing bad about being good, there’s also nothing great about being good. It is hard to imagine a Halloween without Kisses, but these little chocolate droplets are rarely even thought about to begin with. Hershey’s Kisses are sweet and tasty when they are there, but are quickly tossed aside when something more compelling comes along. Those who prefer Hershey’s Kisses are likely to be something cute, safe and forgettable, like Cinderella or a tennis player.

Red Hots

Red Hots are one part sugar, one part spice and all parts adventurous. They may not be everybody’s cup of tea, but everyone respects them for taking a little walk on the wild side. Lovers of Red Hots are always dressed as something interesting, and possibly something a little off-kilter, such as a zombie bride or one of those blue alien things from Avatar.

Dum Dums

These mini lollipops are sweet, well-liked and come in a huge variety of flavors that satisfies all tastes. Once you unwrap a Dum Dum, an enjoyable but short-lived candy experience is revealed. People love Dum Dums, and they are generally easy to get on Halloween, albeit you may end up with a flavor that is not your first choice. Dum Dums thus represent all of those boys and girls who just want to get a little slutty on Halloween (Playboy bunnies, Chippendale dancers, etc.) — and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.

Candy Corn

Everyone hates candy corn. It’s the candy that exists purely for Halloween’s sake, so while it will never become obsolete, it is an absolutely terrible substance (I can’t even call it food in good conscience) that we are all forced to deal with. Costumes representative of the atrocity that is candy corn would be Joey Fatone in a group dressing as N*Sync, or anything trying to make some obnoxious political statement.

Keep in mind that these descriptions do not represent you as an actual person, but solely your Halloween persona. Sure, you may love being that shy, nice guy in real life, but on Halloween, you can embrace that inner Casanova who grinds up on all the girls at Pixel whilst hidden beneath your funky chicken suit. Thus just for tonight, disregard your inhibitions, be who / what you want to, and party with pirates and pimps until your 8:40 tomorrow.

Pumpkin Pie Shot Recipe

Ingredients:

2 parts Kahlua

1 part Bailey’s

1 part Goldschlager

Cinnamon

Directions:

Mix the Kahlua and Bailey’s first. Add the Goldschalger on top, and set on fire. Sprinkle some cinnamon on top, blow out the flame and then drink!