Stacy's Mom

"I used to volunteer to pick up my brother from elementary school so I could check out the moms."

-Collegetown

Stores Without Borders

Guy: "These pants are from The Gap."

Girl: "Oh, do you have one of those in Canada?"

-Mann Library

Condom Fairy

"You can give one of these to whoever touches your hoo hoo..."

-The Gates

Handsome President

"My wife often has a hard time distinguishing me from George Clooney and Ryan Gosling."

-President Skorton, Upson Hall

Curry Fury

"I want to be an Indian so badly. I want to have curry running thru my veins!"

-Libe Cafe

Rush Week

"Everybody's getting pregnant around here, so many babies everywhere..."

-Ho Plaza