Op-Ed
Frasculinity and Homophobia
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The Red Line
The Red Line
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When I started graduate school here and added Cornell to my list of networks on Facebook, I received a “poke”— a flirtatious or friendly signal depending on its source — from a member of a fraternity largely comprising athletes. The guy’s profile said he was interested in men. Under activities, he had listed various sports. His photos: vertical striped shirts, popped polos, board shorts, flip-flops, beer-in-hand shots with groups of guys.
I ignored the poke. A day later, the joke had blown over. The profile was changed back to “interested in women” and a smattering of goading posts appeared on his wall: “interested in men eh ... [I] always knew there was something a little off about you,” for instance.
Now I was faced with the small but significant choice that gay men have to make when they are singled out. I could ignore it, “get over it,” “lighten up,” “not make a big deal about it.” But I do that enough.
I wrote back, asking what the guy would do if he found out a family member was gay or (God forbid!) one of his frat brothers were. Either of them would not be able to talk to him about it given the way he and his friends treat and talk about gays, I wrote. I speculated on all the locker-room towel-snapping fun he and his friends got out of it and threatened to show up at the fraternity house (naked) next time he “came ’a callin’.”
This last part, I was told, made me look crazy, but I remembered something activist Larry Kramer said once, which was that if gays were viewed as crazy, then maybe people wouldn’t mess with us.
The incident shows that although gays are not beaten up and forced to conceal their sexual orientation in the way they used to be (in part thanks to crazy gays like Kramer), homophobia still manifests itself subtly. And fraternities act as oases within the university environment where homophobic attitudes flourish.
It might seem obvious, but the comedic value of changing a frat guy’s profile to say he’s gay and poking and messaging other gay students at Cornell comes from the shared assumption that gay people are those for whom “something is a little off,” that calling someone gay is an insult according to the norms of masculinity that prevail in the group.
Diversity at Cornell and similar places is social engineering as much as it is public relations; in the university atmosphere, the divisions that isolate certain groups from each other in society loosen. This acts as a natural deterrent to racism and homophobia, which flourish in isolated groups whose perceptions are governed by unchallenged and uninformed prejudices. Which is exactly what fraternities are.
Whereas the purpose of diversity stems from the fact that different types of people interact, fraternities act as self-selecting social units that remove themselves from this essential and enriching socialization process. To provide some anecdotal evidence: of the first 30 members of this fraternity’s Facebook group, all but one is white; none is gay.
One wonders what good a diverse student body does if frat brothers select out of it and persist in the heterosexist attitudes and behaviors they came to college with. Not only do these attitudes prevail in frats; they are shielded from being challenged and scrutinized by parent organizations that invariably step in when some frat-induced idiocy transpires (the actions of one person do not … our organization does not support ...). These knee-jerk defenses fail to acknowledge the social context that frat behavior operates in, and in so doing, miss the opportunity to address them.
It is not that a joke at my expense by some jock is wounding. The problem is that it evinces an underlying homophobic culture that keeps alive beliefs and attitudes that prevent me from being married in this country, or, in extreme cases, lead to violence against gays and lesbians. It is not the case that no common-interest student groups should be formed — they are essential to the vitality of Cornell culture; it is the insularity and homogeneity of certain groups that is troubling. In particular, frats are problematic because they are organized around the enforcement of heterosexist masculine norms. Of course one bad apple is not an indictment of all members of an organization, but it is hard to believe that incidents like this would be so common if fraternity culture were supportive of gays.
Students at a place like Cornell — members of this fraternity included — should be leaders in dispelling homophobia rather than reinforcing it.
Perhaps it is unfair to single out this fraternity, but they can consider it my poke back.
Gabriel Arana is a graduate student in Linguistics. He can be contacted at garana@cornellsun.com. The Red Line appears Thursdays.
column
that was excellent. I am a straight male in my third year. I do not belong to a fraternity. Given the number of homphobic comments I hear while passing through my day, I am surprised that I haven't heard more from Cornell's homosexual students. They are here. And they are hearing what I am.
stereotypes?
It's outrageous that someone found that kind of joke to be funny, and I commend you for speaking out on homophobia.
At the same time, how do you expect to challenge stereotypes about gays when you eagerly apply stereotypes to all fraternities and their members? Nearly 3000 Cornellians take part in Greek Life -- don't characterize all of them by the actions of a misguided minority.
- A recent alum
homophobia
When one thinks of a gay guy, we automatically picture one of those flamboyant types. A closeted frat brother doesn't see himself as fitting under that stereotypical definition of homosexual and stays in the closet. I know several Cornell students who are closeted, including frat members and they all agree that Cornell is homophobic. Perhaps if we got rid of the labels, and start judging people as people, this wouldn't be an issue!
I love reading your column
Keep up the good work!