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DiscussDear Z,
My boyfriend is really into “sexting,” or sexy texting for the naïve. He sends me pictures of himself and talks dirty to me via text message. The first time this happened it was amusing and kind of a turn on, but since the first time it happened it's been non-stop — multiple texts a day! They make me a little uncomfortable, what if someone sees these texts?
Sincerely,
Sextty Time
Dear Sextty Time,
I guess after phone sex came cyber sex and after cyber sex came ... sexting? I think your boyfriend is lazy. Why doesn’t he get off his man butt and give you a call, or better yet talk dirty to you in person? It sounds like the romance recently escaped from your relationship. Who needs sexting when they can have sex whenever they want? That’s the best part of being in a monogamous boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, is it not? Some may disagree (not A, of course) but monogamy is all about afternoon delight and morning encounters, right?
It does not sound like your boyfriend is the serious type (and I am not talking in terms of the level of seriousness of your relationship) so I don’t think he will appreciate a simple, “Stop sexting me.” As usual, I have the crazy person answer to your problems and also the less insane answer. Crazy person: Do something to his phone, disable the camera function (stilettos anyone?), submerge it in water (oops it just dropped in the toilet). I don’t think this is a long-term solution but it would be amusing at best, because it does sound like he’s a little bit of a phone addict. For the less insane: Mess with him via text, i.e. he sends a sext you send a text back that says something along the lines of, “Too bad I have my period right now, and it’s really heavy.” Or, dropping the pregnancy bomb is always a good one ... with babies in mind I hope there would be no response sext.
If neither of these work for you, then bring the romance back into your relationship: dinner, walks in the park, a whole day in bed ... you get the point. I look forward to sexting’s successor — BBMs anyone?
Xoxo,
Z
Dear Z,
With summer break fast approaching, I have no idea what to do about the relationship I am in. I really like the girl but I don’t know if we should try and stick it out for the summer, because we will be far away from each other in different time zones. We aren’t official but it’s been about six months now. What should I do?
Xoxo,
Summer love?
Dear Summer love?,
Since you are not official I say don’t jump ship — there’s no need to make the summer any more serious than your relationship is now. Stick it out until you figure out what’s best for the both of you. Please don’t panic, it really won’t be good for either of you. Long-distance relationships are tough, and I am sure anyone who’s been in one would agree with me, but sometimes it is worth it.
Even if you’re afraid, there’s no reason to pull out of something that’s working. Even if your relationship changes in the summer, keep it positive. There is no need to spend hours on the phone or fly thousands of miles to visit each other every week. I am sure that just a few texts and calls every once in a while will suffice. Just make sure you are on the same page going into it.
Xoxo,
Z
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