Overheard: No More Uglies! We Have Enough!

Send your overheards to overheard@cornellsun.com [1]

Engineering Student: I would found an institution where no person can fucking use CoursEnroll.

— Hollister B14

Frat Boy #1: Why didn’t you invite me, asshole?

Frat Boy #2: I tried like eight times, you little slut.

— Outside of Hollister Hall

Engineer [ to friends]: I know a guy who will only take 150 Facebook friends ... Yeah, whenever someone new friends him he has to de-friend someone else.

— Ho Plaza

[Tour group passes]

Girl: Look at all those losers. Like, just DO’'T come to Cornell.

Goth Guy: Yeah, and they’re all ugly too.

Girl: Geez, no more uglies!

Goth Guy: We have enough! We're all FULL!

— Ho Plaza

Fraternity Tool: Who wants to wear a t-shirt with an old ass starving man on it?

Annoyed Intellectual:

That’s Gandhi … you idiot.

— Mann

Male Engineer 1: What the hell smells?

Male Engineer 2: Like what?

Male Engineer 1: Like flowers.

Male Engineer 2: Oh. I just took a shower.

— Study Group

Pre-Frosh Girl: So Spring Break for me is next week but I’m having surgery.

Guy: I’m sorry to hear that, is everything going to be okay?

Pre-Frosh Girl: My parents promised me that if I got into Cornell they would pay for a nose job for me.

Guy: Ooooooooo.

— North Campus

[Two girls about to make out]

Sorostitute 1: You look like a frog!

Sorostitute 2: Well you smell like beef!

Interrupting Boy: I can’t hear you, you’re too fat!

— Frat Party

Girl1: Sarah and I are, like, half sisters.

Girl 2: Wait, why?

Girl 1: Because we’ve slept with three of the same guys.

Girl 2: Yeah, but they’re all in the same frat; that doesn’t count!

— Outside the Palms

Freshman 1: I kind of want to go on one of those Cornell Days tours.

Freshman 2: I know! I still don’t know where Mann Library is!

Freshman 1: Me neither! Or Trillium, or the Cornell Store!

— Arts Quad

Really Drunk Guy: I. NEED. A daddy’s girl.

Really Drunk Girl: I love my daddy!

Really Drunk Guy: I’ll treat you like your daddy can’t!

— College Ave.

Girl [yelling]: Make sure you wake me up tomorrow before you leave!

Friend: OK, I'm leaving at like 8:45ish.

Girl: Make sure I’m up though. I need to get a haircut. Tell me that if I dont get up I’m going to have a mullet!

— Green Dragon

Awkward Guy: So, um, your, um, shirt, is pink.

Awkward Girl: Yeah, um, I have a hat.

Awkward Guy: You’re not wearing it.

Awkward Girl: Yeah, I have it at home.

— Okenshields