Eclipse's Best Halloween Costumes for 2008

[1](Former) Bear Stearns Employees [2]Gossip Girl [3]Sarah Palin [4]Amy WinehouseWant to dress like a whore, but feel that it is inappropriate 364 days of the year? Need an excuse to dress like a bum? Just want to pretend to be someone else for a night? Lucky for students and partygoers everywhere, tonight is good old Halloween, the one debaucherous night where it is socially acceptable to dress as slutty, crazy or out-of-character as you wish.

While it is a bit late in the game, and there is certainly not enough time left to craft a super-elaborate costume by this Halloween evening, there is certainly no need to resort to a witch, ghost or cat costume just yet. Eclipse has compiled our list of the best Halloween costumes for 2008, complete with tips and tricks to make the costumes as believable (and funny) as possible.

Gossip Girl Characters

Whether you love them or hate them, every Monday night the characters of Gossip Girl capture the attention of a disturbing number of Cornell students. Capture the attention of fellow party-goers by dressing up as one of the signature characters. Serena and Blair can easily be emulated by donning the most expensive-looking threads you can find; go trendy for Serena and classic (with a headband!) for Blair. Throw on a ridiculously high pair of heels and a smile or a sneer (depending on your character) and you’re good to go. The costume is especially effective if you hire a black Towncar to chauffeur you for the night, but a haughty and privileged attitude will also get you far in these girls’ shoes.

Amy Winehouse

If you’re looking to use an entire tube of eyeliner or an entire can of hairspray, consider dressing up as everyone’s favorite drug-addled singer: Ms. Winehouse. There are really no rules when it comes to this chick, but the hair and the eyeliner are necessary if you want to be recognized as the (in)famous singer. When pressed to interact with others, lament about your jailed lover or try to convince everyone that you are not on drugs. Stumbling and/or falling over only add to the effect of the costume, so don’t stress if you get too drunk to walk in those sky-high stilettos. Bonus costume points if you are heroin-thin or carry around a (fake) crack pipe.

Former Bear Stearns Employees

This time last year, dressing as a Bear Stearns banker would have entailed renting the most expensive attire possible and driving your BMW or Porsche up and down College Ave. for hours on end. However, over the past few months the economic situation has changed enough that a corporate banker costume entails an entirely new set of demands: trade in the latest duds for whatever is on the sale rack at JC Penney. Don't forget the remnants of your former life of grandeur: a broken squash racket, soiled loafers (preferably with untied laces) and a begging cup. A half-empty bottle of scotch isn't a bad idea, either; just make sure it’s the cheap stuff. Be sure to yell at anyone remotely wealthy looking who walks by, most especially the former Bear CEO Alan Schwartz, whose character can also be donned for Halloween with some comfy (but expensive) retirement-like clothes and some old Bear merchandise.

Sarah Palin

Everyone wants to be a maverick, and the best way to realize this great goal is to spend Halloween parading as today's most famous (or infamous) politician: Governor Sarah Palin. Whether you love her or hate her, this small-town girl, with her iconic glasses and beehive hairdo, makes a great Halloween ’08 costume. To make yourself all the more authentic, however, you may want to consider droppin' all the g's at the end of words, winking obsessively, carrying a hockey stick and tackling anyone dressed as a moose. Pregnant Bristol (see below) also makes a great accessory for Sarah Barracuda. While this is bound to be a popular costume choice this year, it may not be a legitimate costume option next year, so use it while you can!

Pregnant Teenagers

Infant children seemed to be a hot celebrity accessory in 2008, with baby bumps the gold standard of celeb trends. Amidst all of the hormones and pregnancies, a few stuck out (and we don’t mean just the bellies): the pregnancies of Bristol Palin and Jamie Lynn Spears. If you’re short on time and are unable to gather costume supplies, this costume is particularly easy: just throw on a stretchy shirt, throw a pillow or a rolled-up sweatshirt under the belly and pretend you’re still in high school. For a particularly interesting twist, go accompanied by a Britney or a Palin, or combine this costume with our suggested Cornell pre-frosh costume. This is not only an overwhelmingly simple costume, but the belly will also provide extra warmth on a cold Halloween evening.

Joe or Joanna the Plumber

Now that finance companies are no longer recruiting every AEM and economics major with a pulse, another honorable profession has conveniently entered the national spotlight: the ever stable path of the plumber. The costume is relatively simple: old jeans, a t-shirt or button-up, practical boots for stinky situations and the attitude of the average middle class working American (easy, right?). However, a plumber is never a plumber without the vital plunger. (We recommend a clean, new one.) Be sure to engage in political discussions as much as possible, and confront anyone dressed up as either presidential candidate about their “tax policy.” Not only will you enjoy an amazing costume, people will think you follow current events, and you will be ready for any septic problems at parties. What fun!

Cornell Pre-frosh

We were all there at one point in our lives, so why not spend Halloween re-living those innocent moments of naivety: that sweet time spent as a pre-frosh. Clutch a campus map as though it were the elixir of life, wear a Cornell sweatshirt to show off your school spirit and sport a backpack large enough to send you toppling backward. Though accessories and clothing are certainly important, one cannot parade as a pre-frosh without that sparkling gaze of wonder and utter confusion that can only come from the untainted mind. Jaded upperclassmen will thus have extreme difficulty pulling off this costume.