Promiscuity is a relative word. But even I, someone who writes about sex and relationships, was taken aback when I heard about someone who has had sex with more than 100 people. I had to find him. Luckily, he agreed to sit down with me to answer all of my burning questions.
We met mid-afternoon at Libe Café. He walked in, tall, handsome, dressed as your typical fraternity man — someone who looked like he could have sex with 100 women, but was not particularly drop-dead gorgeous. I decided to jump right in.
Morgan: I’ve heard you’ve had sex with over 100 people. Do you know your exact number?
Man of Many Women: Not true, not true!
M.B.: Oh, well, come on! So how many is it?
M.O.M.W.: (With much hesitation) Well, it’s pretty close to 100. I know the exact number give or take five.
M.B.: Have they all been women?
M.B.: Do you think you could remember all their names?
M.O.M.W.: All of them, give or take five. Mainly just because I’ve been blackout, you know. But I try to keep track of the majority of them — I have a list! Not available to be seen. But mainly a couple of them that I don’t remember are because I’m terrible with names, ask anyone from pledging — it was hard.
M.B.: I’m sure there are many readers that want to know your secret, so how do you do it?
M.O.M.W.: Well I’ve been asking myself that for a long time. I don’t know, I just try to be myself the majority of the time, like when I’m sober. When I’m drunk, it’s a lot easier — I’m intoxicated, they’re intoxicated. I feel like in those situations it’s less about what kind of quality person I am. They care less so that leads to a vast majority of them. I just try to be funny, try to be nice.
M.B.: Have you ever been in a serious relationship?
M.O.M.W.: I’ve had one girlfriend in my entire life. It was back in the 7th grade. She was the only girlfriend I ever had and it lasted a month. It happened because her best friend was dating my best friend and we were always together. It has kind of freaked me out recently — she has a baby that’s about two years old. So I think I dodged a bullet!
M.B.: When did you lose your virginity? How did you lose it?
M.O.M.W.: My junior year of high school, a senior asked me to her prom and of course, immediately, I said yes. But I didn’t know her that well so I asked her to hang out a couple times. And, no, it was not prom night — it was a couple weeks before. It ended up being a casual movie night with a bottle of wine.
M.B.: When were your most intense years of sexual activity?
M.O.M.W.: Definitely freshman and sophomore year. I transferred from a different school so I spent freshman year there. The atmosphere was a lot different in terms of partying and going out. Freshman year there were a lot of house parties, and if you had a fake I.D., you would try to get into bars. We constantly had parties and it was easy.
M.B.: It’s easier than here?!
M.O.M.W.: Yes. Believe it or not, people at my old school drank a lot more than we do here.
M.B.: Do you feel like you are particularly skilled in bed because of your extensive experience? How do you know?
M.O.M.W.: Yes and no. It depends on which state of mind I’m in. A lot of this revolves around alcohol. If I’m drunk, I honestly don’t know — we never have real conversations about it. They say it’s good but girls tend to lie about that kind of stuff. They want to boost your ego or make you feel better, but also it would be awkward if they told you it was bad.
M.B.: Tell me the story of the worst sex you’ve ever had.
M.O.M.W.: The worst sex is this one time where I couldn’t come, and I don’t know why. But she kept on wanting to go more and more, and it was just awkward. I’m trying to think of a better word, but it was just bad. Maybe she didn’t know what she was doing. It was freshman year. I think it was uncomfortable because I knew her pretty well beforehand so that just made it more awkward.
M.B.: What about the best?
M.O.M.W.: It was actually a threesome. It involved a girl from my old school that I was talking to for a little while. I was in the city, and we were hanging out with all her friends and everything. We started having sex in the living room. About 10 minutes into it, one of her friends walks in through the french doors and starts taking off her clothes. I thought, “I guess this is happening.” And it just went on from there. Ever since, I haven’t been able to recreate that scenario. It’s kind of like the thing a lot of guys dream about.
M.B.: Is it worth all the hype?
M.O.M.W.: Yes. For all of you out there, I would recommend you try it.
M.B.: Would you feel any differently having sex with a woman who has also had sex with a large number of people?
M.O.M.W.: Yes and no. It is college, so I get that everyone loves to experiment and that sex is a fun thing. I wouldn’t feel any differently as long as I knew they were clean. I actually get tested every 2 months — my mother’s rule!
M.B.: What do you think the attitude on campus is about sex and particularly, for lack of a better term, promiscuity?
M.O.M.W.: Cornell is a very diverse place where there are so many different opinions on everything. But mainly I would say, especially in Greek life, it is pretty open. You can see people walking home every morning through the streets of Collegetown. But there definitely are people who get that they are part of that scene but also don’t want to be used as objects. So I don’t think it’s a matter of the sex, it’s about the image that they portray.
M.B.: Do you think you’ll ever find the perfect girl?
M.O.M.W.: I definitely do. There is one girl that I really like right now, but I don’t think she likes me quite as much. A guy can dream! But I’ll settle for being just friends with her.
After our interview, a friend of his came up to me, letting me know that I had just interviewed “the most famous womanizer on campus.”
Morgan Bookheimer is a senior in the College of Human Ecology. She may be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Behind the Time appears alternate Thursdays this semester.