Local grocery vendor Wilson Farms was the subject of an attempted robbery Sunday night, at approximately 10:49 p.m., the Ithaca Police Department said yesterday.

Talk in my last column of lace- and otherwise scantily-clad women on the Fall ’09 Runway generated conversation among some of my friends and my editor about Cornell students’ most frequent occasion for getting scandalous: going out. I was going to say: “Friday and Saturday nights,” and then I remembered how the weekend apparently starts on Wednesday. As if there were not enough to figure out, getting dressed to go out is complicated by our lovely fall / winter weather.

Dudes can be cruel to be kind. As a womyn, I can say that. Dudes, you can be cruel — to be “kind” — either to embarrass us or reproduce with us.

Case in point: about a month ago I was walking to a party with my gal pal. We were gabbing about, you know, Sex and the City, and which character we’re most like, and what sort of vodka-tinis we’d be imbibing later, and then we talked about doing our nails, and kissing boys and having the red tide come visit us every 28 days.

Disclaimer: What you’re about to read is really, really gross. If you’re a weak-stomached pansy-ass, this is about as far as we recommend you go. Better luck next week, pansies-ass-pansies. You’ll have to get your superfuntimes another day.

So here goes. The other day, R and R went to the gym as they occasionally do after apple festivals, and they were feeling pretty good. One R took to the treadmill while the other R mounted her usual weird-elliptical-treadmill-hybrid-thing and began to ...

R: WORK IT!

The Ithaca Police Department has released new information relating to the “forcible touching incident” that occurred on the 300 block of College Ave. at around 12:15 a.m. on Sept. 5.

On Monday, the IPD issued a press release, more than a week after the incident, that contains a description of the two suspects. According to the statement, the first suspect is a “white male, thin build, short brown hair, brown eyes, with scruffy facial hair, 5’8” tall, with a large gap in his front teeth.” The second suspect is “5’6” tall, heavy build, brown hair, brown eyes, and as being dirty.”

On the first night of Orientation Week, alone and lost, I called my roommate in a tearful panic.

“Jenni, where are you?” she screamed into the phone.

“I’m lost. I can’t see you. I don’t know where I am. I think I’m about to get arrested.” I cried and ran to hide behind a bush as a police car drove past me. I was living out everyone’s worst first week of college fears. Alone, slightly intoxicated and completely disoriented — I couldn’t imagine a worse way to start off the year.

“Just look at the street signs. What do they say?”

“Um … Cook and Eddy,” I managed to spit out through my tears. There was a click at the other end of the line — I’d been hung up on.

The 2009 Collegetown Urban Plan and Conceptual Design Guidelines, a document containing specific master planning recommendations for the neighborhood bearing its name, has, after a years-long process, earned the endorsement of the Common Council. The plan, originally created by Goody Clancy Consultants, has undergone changes and revisions as residents and student constituencies have butted heads over the future development of Collegetown.

The City of Ithaca Planning and Development Board held a public hearing yesterday at City Hall to hear concerns over the proposed plan for Collegetown. The plan, known as Part One of the 2009 Collegetown Urban Plan and Conceptual Design Guidelines, proposes a number of revisions to the current zoning of Collegetown, including raising height limits in central districts, improving access and the price of parking and increasing mixed-use development. In addition, there are a number of proposed changes to the maximum heights in some of Collegetown’s residential districts. These plans have been met with criticism from a number of members of the Ithaca community.

As part of their continued effort to develop Collegetown, Student Assembly members created the Cornell Collegetown Committee yesterday during their weekly meeting at the Straight.

The resolution, which is sponsored by Chris Basil ’10, executive vice president, and Allen Miller ’10, Greek Liaison. calls for an ad-hoc committee will include three members of the S.A., two members of the Greek tri-council, one member of Campus Life and four members from the Cornell or Collegetown community.

Since 97 percent of residents living in the Collegetown area are Cornell students, the S.A. wanted to enable students to “organize and advocate for student interests in the ongoing work of [local governing bodies of Collegetown],” according to the S.A. resolution.

Compared to typical, economically thriving times, Collegetown restaurants have seen fewer customers enter their establishments while their costs of operation continue to increase during the current recession. In order to continue earning a profit, Collegetown restaurants and bars have had to change many of the details of their operation.

Collegetown’s more formal restaurants seem to be most effected as students look to spend their money more efficiently. Once a popular weekday lunch spot for Ithaca’s locals, the Japanese restaurant Miyake’s weekday sales are reportedly down about 20 percent compared with this time last year as it has been forced to rely on increasingly frugal college students to sustain its business, according to its owner.