September 6, 2001

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Whoa, Episode 2

The Matrix 2 has begun filming in Sydney, Australia, and insiders are already starting to leak rumors. One Australian newspaper has stated that “cloning is the key theme of the movie: Neo (Keanu Reeves) is set to fight 100 versions of himself in a stunning action sequence.” Apparently the producers are going for acting quantity, not quality. Computer geeks around the globe, meanwhile, are demanding that Trinity (Carrie-Anne Moss) be cloned instead and the movie be renamed to Battling Computer Babes in Black Leather.

System Malfunction

System of a Down’s free concert in Hollywood on Monday night turned ugly when the event was cancelled due to safety concerns about overcrowding. In an effort to prove the authorities wrong, fans trashed the stage and threw rocks and bottles at the police. Surprisingly, this little bit of reverse logic didn’t work and the police retaliated with tear gas and rubber bullets. I know metal fans are notorious for being antisocial and belligerent, but picking a fight with L.A. cops? I don’t care how big your death wish is, that’s just stupid.

Is This Really Necessary?

The members of the American Film Institute have emerged from their dank crypts to create their own televised award show. The AFI has struck a deal with CBS for a live, three-hour “AFI Awards 2001” telecast. The event is set to air Jan. 5 in the context of a year-in-review special. A spokesperson for the AFI stated the institute intends to be a trendsetter for the awards show season with the early timing and nature of the show. Somehow, I don’t think the AFI has any right using the term “trendsetter” until they update their Top 100 Funniest Films list to include more than 3 films made in the last decade. And do we really trust the judgment of a group who thinks the world needs another three-hour awards show?

On That Note …

The top-grossing movie of the Labor Day weekend was the critically panned horror flick Jeepers Creepers, once again proving that the opinion of film critics has no bearing on the American public. So, who’s going to tune in to CBS on Jan. 5?

Something Old, Something New

Anne Heche married cameraman Coley Laffoon last Saturday. Once one-half of Hollywood’s highest-profile lesbian couple, Heche’s wedding took place a little over a year after she and partner Ellen DeGeneres ended their relationship. The ceremony took place in downtown L.A. in front of 73 friends and family members. DeGeneres was not on the invite list, which is fine, since DeGeneres will have her hands full with her new CBS sitcom, The Ellen Show. In a move sure to tax her acting skills, DeGeneres will be portraying a lesbian Internet executive: a massive departure from her prior sitcom, Ellen, in which DeGeneres portrayed a lesbian bookstore owner.

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