CAUTION: According to clinical studies performed by Dr. Chen of Penn State School of Medicine, if used improperly this product may cause one to indulge in one’s own self-defeating pathetic neurosis by means of making it so fucking audibly appealing that the crippling sense of jaded resignation seems like a good thing.
When used properly its therapeutic value has proven priceless (although we’ve taken the initiative to set the price at $12.00 and included a fun animated flip booklet with a clever anagram). Perhaps symptomatic of a “quick fix” society, its effects are immediate. However, they may last for an indefinite amount of time.
While it works in an unconventional manner, its effect is entirely conventional and direct, without the unpleasant side effects of nausea. It taps into the core of your youthful emotional disillusionment without simplistically reducing it and then stimulates your booty-shaking channels through a positive feedback mechanism.
Ingredients: vox, piano, guitar, drums, and bass thrown into a computer program, Deeler (Digital Looping Recorder), written by a band member to create this seemingly electronic poppiness that alternates between sparsely disconnected and straight up indie rawk.
Patient Testimonial: I listen to it once in the morning for a quick pick me up to motivate me for the day. It’s got this balance between repeatedly climaxing, instantly catchy, disposable pop and truly affecting music. Track eight, “Rose,” fucked me up royally with a simple metaphor, a voice that switches from annoyingly sinister and deep to a high pitch melodic quiver, and a jazzy upbeat hip-hop piano riff that goes higher and higher and higher until it leaves you abruptly after jumping up and down with a single out-of-tune note after two minutes and forty seconds. It’s quick and to the point without losing accuracy. It gives me the strength to face a world of pseudo-cool indie-rockers and shamelessly propagandist gimmick-marketers with its own devices.
Archived article by Deepal Chadha