October 5, 2006

Listen Up!

Print More

There have been inquiries as to whether Overheard stars ever reveal themselves. To date, no one has been brave enough to divulge their identity to this column. I welcome you, however, to shoot me an email at HYPERLINK “mailto:[email protected][email protected] if you find your words coming back to you (in shades of mediocrity? Simon and Garfunkel, anyone?) in this column and wish to make a redemptory statement on your behalf. For more overheard, check out our accomplice, Overheard at Cornell at http://overheardatcornell.blogspot.com, and look for Overheard every Thursday in the Sun. Keep up the good listening!

Wanna-be Jew on Yom Kippur: (9:30:27 AM): how does one go about becoming jewish?
Guy 1: Auto response (9:30:27 AM): sleeping
Wanna-be Jew on Yom Kippur: (9:31:59 AM): eating breakfast today was probably was not the ideal step 1…
– OverSEEN on AIM

Broham 1: Dude look at how much air there is in this room.
Broham 2: Dude what if they charged money for, like, air?
Broham 1: Dude I wouldn’t care, I’m not THAT fat.
Broham 1: Dude don’t you ever just want to like throw a knife up in the air above a crowd of people and, like, see what happens?
Broham 2: Totally.
-Math Class
Middle Aged Woman: Students these days take themselves way too seriously.
Middle Aged Man: Honey, we were hippies. People don’t do that anymore.

Gal: Oklahoma and Ohio, I always get those two mixed up.
Guy: Yeah.
Gal: Wait which one is in the middle of the country?
Guy: Ah, they both are, kind of.
Gal: Oh, well which one is a state?
Guy: Both
Gal: Yeah that’s why I get them mixed up!
-Ho Plaza
Girl on cell phone: …I mean, I almost feel like they don’t WANT to give us A’s or something!
Bro: Hey come on, sit down.
Gal: Yeah sit down.
Drunk mess of which has just stumbled in: NO! (slams purse on table) I’M BRINGING SEXY BACK!
Bro: Oh god, please sit down.

Girl on cell phone: No! I’m not going to be a dominatrix for him.
-Thurston Ave

Crowd of fans: Here we go Cornell! ::clap, clap, clapclapclap::
Dumb girl: Here we go what? OHHH, Cornell! I could’ve sworn they
were saying Tarheels!
-Schoellkopf Stadium

TA: So when a particle reaches absolute zero, it does not actually stop moving. It goes to its lowest possible energy level, but it still moves a tiny bit.
Student: I knew it! I had the biggest fight about this with my best friend last week.
-Chem 389 Section