April 4, 2008

The Hills are Alive

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The writers’ strike has been over for enough time that programs are finally coming back. You know what that means? Everyone’s favorite pseudo-reality show is returning! What a great, great coincidence that The Hills is picking up this season just as the writers’ strike is over. I don’t quite know why they think we care if it’s real or not — there was actually a time before reality TV bench-pressed traditional shows. Whether Lauren, Whitney, the Brodster and the (camera) crew are really just going about their lives or whether they’re just actors so bad that they are convincingly real as spoiled “SoCal bratz,” we will watch anyway. (That’s why the terrorists hate us.)

But really, how amazing is it that since Lauren left for Paris, Brody suddenly has a girlfriend Lauren knew nothing about before she left about a week earlier? C’mon now! That’s just good TV!

In terms of the reality of the “reality”, though, Whitney is the only character who is mildly convincing and respectable — and McSweeney’s agrees with me. The poised Ms. Port always knows the right thing to say and do to retain professionalism, and actually seems to potentially know something about fashion. Despite her slow, drawn-out L.A. drawl, the girl’s got some skills! I actually worked briefly with her new boss, Kelly Cutrone of People’s Revolution when The Sun went to fashion week — if I was wearing my green pants you might catch a glimpse of me when The Hills airs footage of the Sass & Bide show next week. Unlike Teen Vogue, a magazine no one has ever heard of outside the context of Lauren’s “workplace”, People’s Revolution is very legit in the fashion world and entertainment industry at large. Perhaps by staying on this show and evoking comparisons to the ever-more-plastic Heidi, the professionally and socially retarded Lauren and whatever Audrina is (a vacant echo box?) was the smartest thing Whitney ever did … I should get 3 inappropriate, unintelligent and unprofessional people to follow me around at work! What an evil genius she is …

VERDICT: It’s just so absurd that it becomes awesome. THUMBS UP