October 30, 2008

Overheard Oct. 30: 'I’m so confused gravitationally.'

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Girl (correcting guy’s grammar in a paper): You throw around commas like one dollar bills at a strip show.
— Thurston Ave
Awkward Dude (to friend): It’s so much fun to be in the men’s locker room with a bunch of naked guys. (Awkward silence.) Maybe I shouldn’t have used the word “fun”; it’s interesting. It’s a whole different … dynamic.
— Outside Helen Newman
Amazed Patron at Synapsis: They donated the entire medical school, and now this?!
— Weill Hall
Clean-cut Girl: I don’t like rubbing it the right way!
— Uris
Guy 1: Yo, did you see those breast cancer shirts?
Guy 2: Yeah, what of it?
Guy 1: I liked the “Save Second Base” one.
Guy 2: What’s “second base?”
Guy 1: (pause, then laughter)
Guy 2: Dude, don’t look at me like that and then laugh. It’s a legit question —
Guy 1: You don’t know what second base is?!
Guy 2: Yo, I know the bases are sexual innuendos. Like, I know first base and home base, but not the intermediates!
— Olin Hall
Sorority Girl: Like, how much smaller do you get when the baby comes out?
Drunk Girl: I’m so confused gravitationally.
— North Campus
Freshman Girl to Friend: I just don’t understand it! There are 1500 boys in the entering freshman class and not a single one will have sex with me!
Friend: Well, have you asked them all?
— Appel Commons
Hear something raunchy or ridiculous? Submit your eavesdroppings to [email protected]