We kiss and we laugh, but at first it’s just play
Since we know we that must now get on with our day
But things quickly heat up and the clothes come right off
It happened so fast, we both giggle and scoff
Soon enough I feel pressure upon my knee distal
It is his erection, the grand starting pistol
Leaderboard 2
So he opens his dresser for that bright purple tube,
The time must have come to pull out the lube
And with two fingers he greases the alleyway
Newsletter Signup
But how come it wasn’t wet anyway?
The sex was alright, but that’s not my point
The reliance on lube made the experience less joint
Now don’t get me wrong, lube can be great fun
In fact it’s quite helpful for a very large one
With this reliance on lube in our culture I wonder
If it’s the mark of a bad sexist blunder
And just like a penis gets big, nice, and hard
A vagina ready for sex should need the coastguard
We should be using of this ev’lutionary feat
By enjoying the full effect of a WAP in heat
I hope that this poem helps you save some cash
By stimulating that vulva you can save the lube for the ass
Mike Litoris is a student at Cornell University. Comments can be sent to [email protected]. Meditations of a Masterbater run alternate Sex on Thursdays this semester.
The Cornell Daily Sun is interested in publishing a broad and diverse set of content from the Cornell and greater Ithaca community. We want to hear what you have to say about this topic or any of our pieces. Here are some guidelines on how to submit. And here’s our email: [email protected].