Cornell University is not for the faint of heart, or the weak of bladder. I would argue that there is a serious lack of bathrooms, or at least poor placement of existing bathrooms across many areas of campus, particularly on the Arts Quad. These are some locations where the need for bathrooms (or more of existing ones) is dire.
Olin Library Lobby
This has got to be the building with some of the highest foot traffic on campus, and yet the lobby doesn’t have a single bathroom. Picture this: there’s a cafe right in the lobby, filled with students guzzling coffees, juices and other highly laxative goodies. There are thousands of students coming from and going to class in the lobby study space. They’re usually there studying for a decently long period of time, or arriving from a different building, and need a post-class wee. These masses are faced with either a trek to the corner of the basement, or hoofing it up the stairs to a tiny, grungy, two-stalled bathroom.
White Hall
One toilet — that’s all this massive building filled with classrooms has for women. There is an additional handicapped bathroom hidden by the professors’ offices on the third floor, but frankly it’s more practical to squat on the slope than make that hike with a bursting bladder. For us plebs on the lower levels, there is one lone porcelain throne for the government majors of Cornell to vie for before and after class. Furthermore, despite there being only ONE toilet, the basement chronically reeks of sewage.
West Dining Halls
My quarrel with the West Dining bathroom set-up is not in quantity, or quality, but location. These bathrooms are clean, respectable places with ample stalls. The catch is that the bathrooms aren’t actually in these dining halls, like in Morrison. This means using swipes, or bartering with the food bouncer to let you back in if you’ve had one too many apple juices at brunch — or if you just want to sit for a few hours and study through the day while making the most of your swipe.
Goldwin Smith Hall
Generous, kindly and benevolent Cornell donors, if any of you are out there reading this, please consider donating for more Goldwin Smith bathrooms.
Nothing is quite like standing with four other women in a stinking bathroom, avoiding eye contact and in complete silence, waiting for the slowpoke in the stall to finish up so you can get to class. And then you’re the slowpoke in the stall, while the (growing), bladder-bursting line-up is standing two feet away in reverent silence. I’m not personally familiar with the situation for men, but I’ve heard it’s not great as well.
Sibley Hall
There’s a weird smattering of alternating genders and single stall bathrooms in here that are all pretty gross. A bit embarrassing for them, being home to the Architecture and Urban Planning program. Having classes here is annoying because it means a bloodbath in the ten minutes before class for the lone handicap stall toilet on the first floor.
Plant Science
Trying to use the bathroom in Plant Science is a fever dream. The saloon-style doors on the second floor are appalling in their own right, but there are simply not enough in the building overall. Fingers crossed that the ongoing remodel includes the bulldozing of the saloon doors and the addition of further modern plumbing.
I will say, the engineering buildings are pretty good regarding their bathroom distribution, hence their absence on this list. I interviewed a handful of engineers and they all seemed content with their situation, as have I been in my brief visits there.
There seems to be a clear correlation between the age of buildings and how abysmal their bathroom distribution is. My suspicion (not officially fact checked) is that it’s a mix of old infrastructure, based on outdated building codes, and — for the oldest buildings — a lack of women’s bathrooms originally, making for an inadequate final product.
I do hope somebody with purchasing power in administration sees this — many of your students, particularly women, find themselves having to leave in the middle of class to use the bathroom, or arrive late because the lines are so atrocious in many of these key locations.
If you’re curious to see the bathrooms of Cornell that I’m pleased with, feel free to check out my 2022 official ranking.
Aurora Weirens is a fourth year student in the College of Arts & Sciences. Her fortnightly column The Northern Light illuminates student life. She can be reached at [email protected].