I’m not much of a partier, nor am I very Irish – my lone Irish relative, imprisoned in Ireland for “disorderly conduct,” immigrated to the United States at 5-foot-6 and 225 pounds. Despite his dimensions, he fought for the Union in the Civil War. Perhaps as one of the cannonballs. He passed shortly after the War, a man ahead of his time — not from cholera or tuberculosis, but the modern killer — clogged arteries.
With him in mind, I donned my finest green attire, rounded up my buddies and set out for Linden Avenue on Saturday afternoon.
The St. Patrick’s Day Darty, always held on the Saturday closest to St. Patrick’s Day, marks one of the largest student celebrations at Cornell, second only to Slope Day. The beauty — or horror — of the darty is that every antic unfolds in broad daylight. Here are some of the “best” things I witnessed on Saturday, in no particular order.
Clever Borg Names
A “BORG” (an acronym for a Blackout Rage Gallon) is a gallon water jug repurposed with other fluids, often personalized with a name scrawled in Sharpie, and carried around throughout the day. Some of my favorites: “Borgan Ramsey,” “Borgan Donor,” “I’m so Borgeous,” “The Great Borgsby,” “Borg Leaf Clover” and “Borgs of a Feather.”
Sibling Sightings
Block parties have a tendency to bring people together — especially those who rarely cross paths. Case in point: I ran into my younger brother, an engineering student (whereas I am not), and therefore not someone I typically run into. Two of my friends also bumped into their younger brothers here. It turns out the darty doubles as an impromptu family reunion.
Festive Outfits
The creativity was, of course, unmatched. Frat brothers painted green, shiny gold purses and jewelry, Leprechaun hats, green sports jerseys, girls covered in glue-on sparkles, four-leaf clover sunglasses, attachable red beards and even a Grinch onesie were all in fashion on Saturday. However, I’m disappointed to report I saw people wearing Dartmouth apparel.
The Valiant UPS Truck
The real Little Engine That Could. Inch by inch, this devoted FedEx truck braved the drunken masses of Linden, somehow delivering packages without a hitch. No toes were lost in the process — at least none that I saw.
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Run of the Gingers
The redheads were gathered and released. They seemed to almost bounce through the masses with glee. Given the number of phones in the air, there’s undoubtedly more footage of this event than of some major historical moments. Perhaps Cornell should just hire a professional cinematographer next year so we’re not such screenagers.
Amerdeep
Seniors, you know who I’m talking about. Everybody knows Amerdeep — he’s just one of those iconic folks here. Prepare to turn green with envy: I exchanged a wave with him. A brush with celebrity!
Brave Collegetown Restaurant Workers
I commend the workers for their grit and hard work despite the chaos. The restaurants and shops were descended upon by literally thousands of drunk students at roughly the same time – a logistical (and gross) nightmare. I hope the sloppiness they put up with was accompanied by generous tips.
Bulgogi the Cat
Although Bulgogi (full name Bulgogi Beef Rao) wasn’t hitting the streets borg-in-paw, I did pay him a visit at his house. He was such a good-tempered and sweet cat, and clad in his finest green vest.
And so concludes my list of St. Patty’s Darty highlights. Happy St. Patrick’s Day to all, and may the luck of the Irish follow us through midterm season.
Aurora Weirens is a fourth year student in the College of Arts & Sciences. Her fortnightly column The Northern Light illuminates student life. She can be reached at aweirens@cornellsun.com.
