GROSKAUFMANIS | Casual Dysfunction and the College Experience

So much of the stereotypical American college experience, as it’s packaged in pop culture and the memories of nostalgic alumni, seems to be wrapped up in anticipation — and sometimes the romanticization — of dysfunction. Even in the age of hyper-attention to self-care, college remains a bubble in which it’s normal, even commendable, to do things like pull successive all-nighters in the name of work or push passions onto the back burner because they don’t fit our notions of productivity. Staying up all night to study is presented as evidence of a strong work ethic, rather than an unhealthy last resort. At Harvard, students in the class of 2022 were even asked to complete an online “Sleep 101” course, designed to help them develop healthy sleep habits in an environment as “competitive and busy” as college. It is particularly within the context of any work hard, play hard environment, where opposite and sometimes incompatible extremes regarding school and going out are expected to exist simultaneously, that a lot of unsustainable behavior is necessitated.

VAN ZILE | The Tao of Beer Pong

I was standing somewhere on a Friday night during my freshman year when a stranger asked if I wanted to hear the secret of beer pong. I don’t remember what he looked like, just that his face held an expression of profound serenity and compassion. “The secret of beer pong,” he said, “is to throw the ball into the cup.” I asked him what the hell he meant by that. “Beer pong is a metaphor for life,” he said. “What is it to exist but to throw a ball into a cup?

Song for Slope Day

As everyone is surely aware, the Cornell community will be celebrating Slope Day this Friday. The Slope Day Programming Board would like to wish all of you a fun and safe Slope Day and leave you with some advice:

When we come to Cornell we hear a great deal of lore,
Of courses, of parties and oh so much more.
Among all of these stories, one stands alone,
That one is Slope Day, king on a throne.
As all of our classes come to close,
Our collective love for this school most surely grows.
It’s all about hanging out with your pals,
All of the coolest Cornell guys and gals.
There’s no other day where we all get together,
Frolicking happily like birds of a feather.
So get to the Slope where fun will be had,
Really, we’re telling you, it’s totally rad.

Prevent That Hangover

Being the drunk and stupid college students that we are, the dreaded hangover is no stranger to our weekend routine. Dazed and confused after a long night romping around in college town, I wake up to a huge slap in the face by Mother Nature. She’s apparently pissed that I put so much crap into my body. I guess warm beer after warm beer isn’t exactly her definition of natural. So I suffer her angry wrath: a splitting headache, a sandpaper tongue, a rolling stomach, and some weird ache in my legs from my abnormal urge to run around when I drink.

In the Wake of St. Patrick’s, the Undertow Stays Strong

Because of the United Kingdom’s close proximity to Ireland, one would be inclined to think that St. Patrick’s Day would be an enormous celebration here. And it is – for Americans. Although I am surrounded by Scots, Englishmen, and both Irish and Northern Irish alike, I was forced to orchestrate my St. Patty’s Day plans with my American friends. The others followed suit, but couldn’t for the life of them understand why St. Patrick’s Day is such a huge deal in American metropolises spanning the nation at large. But deciding to forgo all questioning in favor of libation, the celebrations commenced for all.

Farewell to Fakes

At long last, the fateful day has arrived. Yours truly is 21.
Yes, this is a big moment for all of us. But before you start clogging the phone lines offering me free drinks, let’s take a moment to reflect on what this once-in-a-lifetime event really means.

Mail Goggles: Making the World a Better Place

When we think of making the world a better place, we often think of large-scale accomplishments, for instance, donating millions of dollars to research or helping end hunger in third-world countries. And while those are absolutely important, we shouldn’t forget to recognize the small-scale accomplishments–the ideas that make our lives easier and more trouble-free.

It’s in that spirit that this blog post honors Google engineer Jon Perlow, who has created a feature called Mail Goggles for GMail users. It is intended to prevent people from “drunk emailing”, or sending embarrassing emails while under the influence of alcohol.