Cornell Frats to Lower Maximum Rice Purity Scores Amid Rise in Sexual Activities 

The Cornell Interfraternity Council has recently announced a dramatic change in their application process — in an effort to maintain their reputation of exclusivity, the IFC has voted unanimously to lower the maximum acceptable Rice Purity Test score to 30. Since 2008, it has become standard for fraternities and sororities to administer a “Rice Purity Test” for their new recruits. Comprising a list of 100 activities — from “held hands romantically” to “engaged in bestiality” — the Rice Purity Test was originally meant to be used for research purposes at Rice University. However, in more recent years, it has become the go-to measure for finding out if potential pledges are cool or not. 

According to a manufactured data set, the average acceptance score at Cornell fraternities was approximately 50/100 in previous years. But due to the rise of apps such as Tinder, Grindr and Gradescope, students claim it has never been easier to get fucked.