I’ve made it a habit of putting falsely serious titles on columns that are pretty much six paragraph jokes. My hope is always that some sentimental person out there clicks on the column hoping to shed an afternoon tear, but really just walks away semi-amused or at least somewhat confused. I’m excited to someday write the titles to articles your mom shares on Facebook. You won’t believe what I’ll come up with. But to be honest, I’m tired of all of this.