As far as middle school sex education programs go, mine was weak to subpar at best. Sure, I got lovely anatomy coloring sheets to bring home and share with mom and dad, but my midwestern abstinence education never served me too well. Good thing I had YouTube. On a separate note, I’ve talked to a disturbing amount of men and women at this school who have casual sex, but never use condoms. It’s understandable when you’re seeing someone regularly and exclusively, but no condom with a random guy? Surely, sex education taught you better.
As a college female, I’ve heard (and experienced) my fair share of morning after horror stories ranging from the comedic “he couldn’t get it to fit” to the panic induced “I had to take a taxi to Planned Parenthood this morning.” These stories are usually recounted over hungover brunches and amidst a cacophony of laughter, a casual setting for a seemingly casual topic. But there remains a rampant, almost unnoticeable issue in the way many young women both talk about and experience sex. Girls seem to talk about sex as something that happened to them rather than with them. Friends have told me that despite multiple sexual encounters, they have yet to feel any sense of pleasure. Others have said they just “let it happen” and wait for it to be over. Sex positivity has become dramatically more prevalent in our culture in recent years, but why are young women still afraid to talk about sex candidly not only with friends, but with their partners? Why are young women afraid to tell their partners they need oral sex in order to orgasm?