SEX ON THURSDAY | Out With a Bang

A couple of years ago, an intense and very witty friend on The Sun sent a message to one of my GroupMe chats asking if anyone wanted to write a Sex on Thursday piece. Coincidentally, I had just returned from a weekend of debauchery in NYC where I had enjoyed a threesome with my high school best friend and our club promoter. So as fate would have it, I began writing Fire & Ice and Cherries in the Snow. Looking back at my previous pieces, I can’t help but feel like this is a bittersweet end of an era as I prepare to leave Cornell. After all, I arrived here having had my first kiss a month before O-Week, so this really was the home of my sexual awakening.

SEX ON THURSDAY | Birth Control, Baby

I went on birth control before I had my first kiss. I did not have to sneak around to Planned Parenthood or make a secret call to my doctor’s office without my parents knowing. My mom just posed the idea to my doctor during one of my annual check-ups. While my doctor and my mother were deep in conversation about the “new” types of birth control, I continually glanced at my phone praying that my childhood doctor wasn’t picturing me as an uncontrollable sex whore. But “hearing my options,” felt a lot less like an adventurous treat and more like choosing which type of allergy medication I’d prefer.

SEX ON THURSDAY | ‘I’m Just Not in the Mood’

My dirty talk these days is, “I’m just not in the mood.”

Oof. I know. This is not the sweet-nothing anyone wants whispered in their ear. Sex drives come and they go. But recently, my sex drive had been going much more than it has been — and I’ve been — coming.

SEX ON THURSDAY | Morita Equivalence Between Sex and Math

Sex and solving mathematical problems are  the same process. Sometimes they are surprisingly quick, inducing a moment of ecstasy but an ultimately unfulfilling experience. Other times, you can try for hours with no progress on the floor of a study room in PSB until you inevitably realize that cumming with a condom just isn’t an option for some people. Even though you know the person you’re with hasn’t gotten tested, you’re still willing to trust them because they have an IUD — and because you haven’t touched a breast since 10th grade English class during a haunting read-aloud of Geoffrey Chaucer’s The Canterbury Tales. Generally, however, as you grow in either mathematical maturity or sexual ability you learn your needs and what problems you have the potential to solve or, in my case, how to eat pussy and smash.

SEX ON THURSDAY | Mixing Sex and Substance

On Oct. 23, The Sun’s headline read “Near-Naked Cornell Runner Attacks 2 Women, Threatens to Rape Them After Taking ‘Acid.’”
I remember reading that. I released an exasperated puff and thought to myself, “I cannot believe that this happens at Cornell.” As I pondered it more, however, I realized, obviously this happens at Cornell. In fact, I’m surprised (but grateful), we haven’t seen worse. We live in a world of athletes dropping acid and stumbling bleary-eyed around parties preying on freshman girls.

SEX ON THURSDAY | The Friend Hook-Up

We are nearing the end of January, which means a few things. One, we recently returned to school and after a long and dry winter break, many of us are back to swiping right and left on our phones. Two, we are approaching Valentine’s Day, which personally doesn’t mean much, but renders me a little lonely nonetheless. And three, we are in the midst of cuffing season, and even the most free-spirited of Sex on Thursday writers are looking for a long-term cuddle buddy. Unfortunately, the new semester plus cold weather plus a sprinkle of desperation can lead to some bad decisions.