Each and every year Super Bowl Sunday rolls around and becomes the only day of the year where I honestly question whether or not I’ve gone bi-polar. I usually get all excited and treat the day as a holiday, only to watch the game stricken in horror, as flashbacks of Scott Norwood’s wide-right continuously plays over and over again in my mind, causing me to cry hysterically before the first Bud Light commercial.
But two nights ago didn’t yield those same emotions.
Instead, amidst watching the Burger King cirque-du-soleil and finding a newfound respect for Ameriquest, I finally found a sick satisfaction in that someone has finally felt my pain – I’m talking about Seattle Seahawk fans everywhere.
Thank God I’m not a Seahawk fan, because after Sunday night if I were one, I’d probably be wanted for murder right now.
First of all, I’m an AFC guy. But after being forced to watch the actual game because 124-year-old Mick Jagger and the non-beer commercials were so boring – something about how ugly people use Dove soap – I started to feel bad for Mike Holmgren, because I suddenly realized that Seattle never really had a chance from the start.
The final chapter of Pittsburgh’s fairy tale was ready to be written. Bettis was finally going to earn his long-awaited championship ring in his hometown, Detroit. And to the liking of every person in the entire world, the story is a great one, exactly like the ones previous to it – like sixth-round draft pick, Tom Brady leading the Pats to victory three times in four years with an offense that featured players who played on both sides of the ball, not to mention the NFL’s gem from a few years back, Kurt Warner coming from NFL Europe to Super Bowl MVP.
Although the stories might make everyone a little teary-eyed, I never would have thought that the media moguls of the United States would finally come to taint America’s passion, football. On the biggest night in sports, with the entire world watching, the NFL and its officiating crew took the game into their own hands and absolutely blew it.
The calls were suspect – such as official Bob Waggoner flagging Darrell Jackson in the first quarter for offensive pass interference after catching what would have been a touchdown pass. Offensive pass interference? In a Super Bowl?
Seattle was then called for holding on the 2-yard line on a play where even John Madden contested that he didn’t see holding. If Madden tells you he didn’t see holding, then it’s pretty obvious that there wasn’t a penalty.
Best of them all was the quarterback sneak Big Ben executed on third down as he supposedly broke the plane of the goal line in the second quarter. It took Bill Leavy and his crew at least five minutes to signal the call and then about three seconds to review it on instant replay.
Thank God the replay of Matt Hasselbeck being down by contact in the third quarter was so obvious that even Bill Leavy couldn’t screw it up.
One question I have is where is Joey Porter when it is the appropriate time to actually say something? Notice how the outspoken Steelers linebacker is suddenly so quiet. It’s kind of hard to trash talk when you’re the one who is in Peyton Manning’s shoes.
While we can’t argue that it is a big market versus small market occurrence because of the salary cap, we can at least see the argument behind the mishap. After Hines Ward crying in the post-game press conference after a playoff loss to the Patriots, Jerome Bettis’ last stop in Detroit, and the world’s passion for hating everything green, the officiating blunder was bound to happen.
And too bad it had to happen to the Seahawks, as if anyone cares anyway. Think about it – before two nights ago could you name one starter on defense for Seattle? Also, why is it that no one seems to remember that the league MVP Shaun Alexander happened to break the record for touchdowns in a season? Seems like nobody wanted to notice them with personalities like Porter, Big Ben, Hines Ward, and Troy Polamalu in the mix. While watching the game, a friend of mine even noted that Alexander seems to look like a chunkier Tiki Barber.
I guess I shouldn’t feel too bad for Seattle fans though. If anything, we should be thankful that we will now instantly forget that Super Bowl MVP Hines Ward held out for most of training camp at the beginning of the season in hopes for a pay-raise. The Steelers also finally proved that Bill Cowher really can’t smile – his mouth just ends up perfectly horizontal.
Sympathies to all Seahawk fans – at least the team got to go to the pre-game parties, hangout with celebrities, and stand next to my girl Michele Tafoya on the sidelines.
Tim Kuhls is the Sun Staff Writer. That’s Kuhls, Baby will appear every other Tuesday this semester.