SEX ON THURSDAY | All My Love, Lady Whisthlehoe

This week, the Lady With No Game has evaded her responsibilities in order to immerse herself in the glittering gilded world that is Netflix’s Bridgerton. I’m even guilty of hiding my headphones and watching the show in class. The hopeless romantic and future gold digger in me can’t resist the world of opulence and courting — the balls, the dresses and the lineup of gorgeous men.

SEX ON THURSDAY | The Truth is Coming: Let’s Talk

Yes, I’ll say it: from the girl who hates talking about feelings and calls them “eelings” because they are too scary, talking about feelings isn’t the sexiest thing, but it allows us to have good sex. It allows us to ensure that both parties agree to the same thing.

SEX ON THURSDAY | What Has Porn Done to Us

There is nothing inherently bad about porn itself until it grooms us into early online sexual activity, making it easy for a suburban five-year-old to see enough creampies to kill a medieval peasant. We have the technological power of a god designed to please the psychological desires of a monkey; there are only so many bananas we can take before we implode. 

SEX ON THURSDAY | Imperfect Match

If using Tinder, Bumble and Hinge all at once wasn’t working for you, it’s your fault for thinking that some campus computer science club could do the trick. But you had nothing left to lose, so you handed over your recreational drug use patterns, your three words of insincere self-description and your shitty sleep schedule to a student-run AI system — as if it could actually locate your soulmate among the countless other sleep-deprived “formal to-do list” keepers at Cornell sharing your passion for “art.”

SEX ON THURSDAY | The Curse of the $300 Vibrator

On one hand, the Osé 2 blasted me into space, but on the other hand, I can’t come down. I’m stuck there on the moon, desperate to get back to Earth. I didn’t just see God like those reviewers did with my last vibrator; I became Him. But being God is a lonely existence.

SEX ON THURSDAY | Just Another Reason to Choose the Nice Guy

If there were two doors in front of you, and behind door number 1 is a nerdy boy who has had two sexual partners, but both were serious relationships, and behind door number 2 is a regular fuck boy whose body count would gross you out, you would choose door number 2. You thought the number of girls would translate to skill, but it turns out the opposite is true.

SEX ON THURSDAY | Cumming of Age in the Early 21st Century

You know who I hate? Millennials. I know what you’re thinking, “Wow, how radical another Gen Z teen thinking they are the shit, hating on side parts and low-rise jeans.” No, it’s more than that. It’s the gay millennials for me. They might have braved the waters and are (slightly) better in some ways than their hetero counterparts, but they really are something else.