March 6, 2007

C.U. Student Streaks During Prelim

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Last Thursday night, an unidentified male — naked as a newborn — streaked through a section of Economics 102 prelim.
The T.A. for the class, Jing Liu grad, claimed it was too late to take a photo by the time shocked onlookers grabbed their cell phones.

The Sun caught up with the streaker, whom we will call Frank. He agreed to an exclusive interview, with nothing but the naked truth.

The Sun: First things first — why?

Frank: Well…I haven’t really thought that out. The human body is a symbol of the absurdity of life, and I thought I was bringing levity to an otherwise terrible situation.

Sun: Was it a spontaneous act or month upon month of careful planning?

Frank: I did plan it out before. It took about five minutes of planning, and a friend offered to drive me.

Sun: So you had help?

Frank: Yeah, I had an accomplice.

Sun: Do you have a particular hatred for economics? Or is it a love for the subject that motivated you to become part of the prelim?

Frank: I’ve never taken an econ class in my life, and I don’t plan to.

Sun: Then what motivated you to streak specifically during the Economics 102 prelim?

Frank: Because, basically, I wanted to go to a big event with a lot of people. I have a couple friends in that class who told me it would be a good opportunity.

Sun: What is your personal history with streaking — how did you start?

Frank: A very fine tradition, I’ve tried — oh fuck it, I can’t think of intellectual stuff.

Sun: Any future plans?

Frank: I’ve got a number of venues in mind, which shall remain undisclosed.

Sun: Can you please re-create the actual event — how would you describe your gait?

Frank: I kind of hopped down the stairs and ran out the bottom door.

Sun: What was going through your mind?

Frank: Nothing specific.

Sun: I imagine, with all the adrenaline rushing, not much room. What were the reactions?

Frank: I recall there was a T.A. who turned around saw me and jumped out of the way. I think it scared her. Apparently it was very, very quiet until everyone realized what had happened. There was shock in the first stages, and then they laughed.
I remember I got lost on the way out. Uris Hall is a horrible, horrible place, the basement is a maze. I had to follow exit signs to get out.

Sun: Would you discourage or encourage others from following in your bare-foot steps?

Frank: I would encourage anyone and everyone to participate in that kind of activity.

Sun: What do you think is the appropriate punishment for streakers?

Frank: Punishment … obviously being who I am I would suggest there be no punishment. Furthermore, I would suggest a free gift — benefits for the people who make the school a more human upbeat place.

Sun: Finally, what would your mother say?

Frank: I’ll get back to you after I tell her. I honestly have no idea.