One thing that we love about How I Met Your Mother is how loyal to the details it is. A few seasons back we learned that Ted managed to build his dream building as an architect. But last season Ted became a professor, and so, we were starting to wonder if Ted would ever be an architect again. Well, this week, Ted finally gets his big break when Barney (Neil Patrick Harris) offers him the chance to build a building for Goliath National Bank. Future Ted opens the episode saying that Ted’s big goal was to give a lecture that would change someone’s life, and in fact, he is successful. But before we find out what that lecture is about, or whose life was changed, we go back a couple days. Ted, Barney, and Marshall are at their booth at McLaren’s and no big surprise, Barney wants to hit on three girls at the bar: a hot girl, a kind of hot girl and a really funny girl, and needs Ted as his wingman. Ted refuses, so Marshall volunteers. This time it is Barney’s turn to refuse as we are treated to a great flashback of how truly horrible of a wingman Marshall is. As Barney goes off to have a threesome with hot girl and kind of hot girl with really funny girl operating the video camera, Robin comes in. She finally reached closure with Don (Ben Koldyke) last night when she saw him on the news. “Where is the poop?” asks Lilly. Not believing that Robin is being truthful for a second. Robin relents and says that instead she drank a lot (she chugged straight something, rum?) and called Don, threatening to kill him. Obviously, she has moved on. Robin says that she never had true closer because Don left so fast. Lilly tells her to delete Don from her phone, which Robin says she does. Barney comes back from rejection by the three girls and the gang comments on his quick return (Marshall: how was flying solo? And by solo, I mean so low that you got shot down). Barney is not worried, he allllllllllllllllllways gets a yes. Yes, always with all of those L’s. He has a system. First comes the initial contact, then comes the ignoring stage. Apparently, he has a golden rule that is no dinner before sex, he has to have sex with a girl at least 3 times before even considering it. It is a good thing that this show has good guys like Ted and Marshall to balance out Barney’s, um, interesting outlook on life. The next day, Ted is teaching and Barney comes into the class. Ted is a little confused, “are you dating one of my students? Is it Rachel?” Apparently Rachel has a love of provocative sweaters. But, no, in fact Barney brings in Ted’s GNB building that he had designed before and tells Ted that he can build it! Later in Barney’s office, Ted, with a new vest (super hot, we approve), declines Barney’s offer. As Ted is leaving Rachel walks in. Creepy Barney, she is only 19. Back at the apartment, we are witness to an amazing conversation about space architecture. Ted says GNB is the Empire, and that he doesn’t want to build the Death Star. Marshall insists that it would look amazing on his space resume, and adds that Ted wouldn’t be stupid enough to put an exposed vent over the core. In addition, he thinks that clearly marked emergency stops should be put in all garbage compactors. Thank God Emma has a brother, otherwise this would have been over her head.
While talking to Marshall, Ted realizes that Barney has been putting the moves on him. He ignored him, then he used backhanded compliments, then moved on to intense eye contact and touching. Ted is creeped out, but also loves the attention. No one noticed his new vest except Barney. (We did Ted! We did!).
Back at the apartment (again), Lily and Marshall are yelling at Robin for not actually deleting Don’s number. Robin says it’s not so easy to let go of a number, because then you have to let go of all the memories and all the possibilities of what Future You could be. Robin makes Lily delete the number of her dojo and has Marshall delete the number for Edwin, the man who books gigs for his lawyer funk band. Producers, why have we not seen this band before? Lawyers in old school white wigs and Marshall thrusting while wearing his intervention hat. Best flashback ever.
The news reaches Ted that Barney hired someone else. Ted realizes that this is a move by Barney to get him to take the job, but Marshall corroborates Barney’s story and says he did the paperwork. The job went to someone else. Of course, being human (and kind of stupid) Ted freaks out and goes back down to GNB to offer himself up for the job at half salary and he will be willing to do things that the other architect wouldn’t even dream of. Marshall again proves that he is the worst wingman ever, and admits that it is a move, and that there is no other architect. Ted goes on a rant about how he can’t work with people who lie to him, and Barney says he was just playing a game that he has worked on 236 women. Someone look up the episode where Barney gets his 200th. I feel like this was a long time ago, and he should have more than 236 right now. But maybe I am overestimating Barney’s grossness.
So Ted goes back to his classroom and is lecturing about “La Sagrada Familia.” Emma saw this building this summer, and it was amazing. However, it was unfinished because the architect, Gaudi, got hit by a bus. Ted goes on and on about how when you don’t finish things they are unfinished (duh), and then he realizes that his dream project is unfinished. (Props to an unnamed individual who recognized that they were playing Schubert’s “Unfinished Symphony” in the background. Classy touch HIMYM.) So, Ted takes the job, and we learn that Ted’s lecture changed his own life, not one of his students. Selfish Ted. Also problem: he has a contract. He probably can’t leave Columbia in the middle of a semester. Loose ends like that irritate us.
Throughout the episode, Robin has left life-threatening messages on Don’s phone even after she deletes his number because she has it memorized. (“This just in” is what I’ll say when I’m stabbing you. And that Asian slut on your Facebook page, she’s dead too.”). Not sure why Don didn’t call the cops, but whatever. Eventually, Robin forgets Don’s number, and now she is officially over him. $20 says Don comes back in the next episode.
Fashion problem for this episode: really ugly sweaters1. Lily’s black and white striped monstrosity. Not well fitting, looked itchy, and didn’t really go with her hair.2. Robin’s light blue sweater with big seahorses kissing on the back. Enough said.3. Rachel’s “provocatively low sweaters”. Um I’ve seen more provocative things on Barney’s mom. Come on HIMYM, sex it up.
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Original Author: Emma Carlsson