September 22, 2006

Burning Question

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This week’s Burning Question is one of great philosophical importance: “In a war between humans and zombies, who do you think would win?” We asked some of Cornell’s resident humans what they thought:

Zheng Gu ’09 said:
“That’s a tough question. On the one hand, you think zombies would win because they don’t die. On the other hand, you’d think humans because they’re smarter. It’s a balanced match.”

Celia Smith ’09 said:
“Well if we’re talking your run of-the-mill undead guy who’s falling apart, I’d definitely put my money on the humans because the zombies don’t really have much brain tissue left.”

Eyden Reinhardt ’09 said:
“Humans, because they’re smarter. I mean, can zombies think? Not that I’ve seen, no.”

Richard Jin ’09 said:
“Zombies would win. The principles of infection dictate that an infectious virus, increasing the chances of infection once it enters a host, means there’s an exponential [growth] in zombie population. They can’t be stopped.”

Jonathan Hui ’09 said:
“Zombies would win. We don’t know how to kill them.”